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josh-katie | Josh + Katie Walters

July 3, 2025 • General

Katie and I are just getting back from a marriage conference — not to speak, but to learn.

We went to this conference because we want to grow. We want our marriage to keep moving forward. Your willingness to learn reveals your desire to grow in marriage.

And here’s the thing: healthy marriages are built by lifelong learners.

In fact, the word disciple literally means learner. As followers of Jesus, we’re called to stay humble, curious, and teachable — not just in our faith but in every area of life, especially marriage.

The couples who inspire us the most aren’t the ones who have it all figured out. They’re the ones who stay hungry to grow — who read, who ask for help, who invest in their relationship, and who stay curious about their spouse.

The moment you stop learning is the moment your marriage stops growing.

So let me ask you — what’s your next step as a learner in your marriage?

  • Maybe it’s reading a book together.
  • Maybe it’s listening to a podcast on your commute.
  • Maybe it’s planning that overdue date night.
  • Or maybe, like us, it’s attending a conference.

Wherever you are, don’t settle! Your marriage is worth the investment.

Josh + Katie

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  • Growing in friendship with your spouse is one of the strongest predictors of long-term marital happiness.

When we stopped trying to fix everything…. and started rebuilding friendship. That changed everything.

1. Turn Toward Each Other in Small Moments

Respond to each other’s “bids for connection” yes even sending and responding to reels your spouse sends 😉small attempts to engage like sharing a story, asking a question, making a joke, or reaching for affection.

When you consistently turn toward instead of ignoring or dismissing, friendship deepens over time.

2. Stay curious about each other’s inner world: stresses, dreams, fears, goals, favorite things, current pressures.

People change over time. Friendship grows when you keep learning your spouse instead of assuming you already know them.
Ask:

* What’s been weighing on you lately?
* What are you excited about right now?
* How can I support you this week?

3. Prioritize Positive Shared Experiences

Research shows couples need regular positive interactions to buffer stress and conflict. Friendship is strengthened through enjoyment, novelty, laughter, and teamwork.
Examples:

* Walk after dinner
* Coffee on the porch
* Cooking together
* Trying something new
* Inside jokes and playful texting

Marriage often weakens not from one big event, but from neglected friendship. Romance may fluctuate, but friendship can be built daily.
  • When your spouse walks in, or walks out, pause what you’re doing. Look up. Move toward them. Kiss hello. Kiss goodbye.

It sounds small, but relationship research consistently shows that brief moments of connection build trust, security, and emotional closeness over time. Priority is often communicated in seconds, not speeches.

Stop. Drop. And roll (kiss). Small habit to keep the fire going! Do you and your spouse make an effort to do this?
  • Silly blooper video 😂 but it’s science. You might not need more time together—you might just need to put your phone down.

It’s amazing how much more connected we feel just by looking into each other’s eyes and getting the devices out of the way.

Send this to your spouse if you are ready to “tackle” the phone problem together. The weekend is a great time to start!
  • Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Growing in friendship with your spouse is one of the strongest predictors of long-term marital happiness. When we stopped trying to fix everything…. and started rebuilding friendship. That changed everything. 1. Turn Toward Each Other in Small Moments Respond to each other’s “bids for connection” yes even sending and responding to reels your spouse sends 😉small attempts to engage like sharing a story, asking a question, making a joke, or reaching for affection. When you consistently turn toward instead of ignoring or dismissing, friendship deepens over time. 2. Stay curious about each other’s inner world: stresses, dreams, fears, goals, favorite things, current pressures. People change over time. Friendship grows when you keep learning your spouse instead of assuming you already know them. Ask: * What’s been weighing on you lately? * What are you excited about right now? * How can I support you this week? 3. Prioritize Positive Shared Experiences Research shows couples need regular positive interactions to buffer stress and conflict. Friendship is strengthened through enjoyment, novelty, laughter, and teamwork. Examples: * Walk after dinner * Coffee on the porch * Cooking together * Trying something new * Inside jokes and playful texting Marriage often weakens not from one big event, but from neglected friendship. Romance may fluctuate, but friendship can be built daily.
3 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
1/4
When your spouse walks in, or walks out, pause what you’re doing. Look up. Move toward them. Kiss hello. Kiss goodbye. It sounds small, but relationship research consistently shows that brief moments of connection build trust, security, and emotional closeness over time. Priority is often communicated in seconds, not speeches. Stop. Drop. And roll (kiss). Small habit to keep the fire going! Do you and your spouse make an effort to do this?
3 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
2/4
Silly blooper video 😂 but it’s science. You might not need more time together—you might just need to put your phone down. It’s amazing how much more connected we feel just by looking into each other’s eyes and getting the devices out of the way. Send this to your spouse if you are ready to “tackle” the phone problem together. The weekend is a great time to start!
4 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
3/4
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing.
It means you’re in it.
Stay. Do the work.

✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
Messy doesn’t mean failing. It means you’re in it. Stay. Do the work. ✨ our life message: Messy Marriages marked by Mercy = Immeasurably More!
4 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
4/4
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